A couple of thoughts for this Scorpio Moon day.
"I think he knew that, through his own pain, his own suffering, his own anxiety, his own love, and his own journey, he could relate to people in an intimate way. . . . He was one of the most humble men I ever met and one of the men most tormented with anxiety. . . . At the same time he was one of the most confident men I ever met." - Brian Carroll, psychotherapist and former Franciscan priest
Anyone who's taken up the mantle of service to mankind inevitably hit an wall in their work. Perhaps it's mere enthusiasm that drove them to their cause, or perhaps they've had deeper, nobler inspirations for their work. However they're motivated, they sooner or later run into a massive obstruction that challenges everything they believed about their intentions and their purpose.
On one side of this wall is every belief they held about their skills, their competence, their experience and their flaws. On the other side of the wall is everything they don't know about everything. The wall itself is doubt, frustration, anger, incompetence, failure, fear, loss... I could go on. The important point is, the wall feels more like an insurmountable mountain, a Mount Everest of lost causes.
Despite the Venus-Uranus bingle, many of us feel we're facing an insurmountable Mt. Everest of lost causes today. This is the feeling we can assume when a major planet like Uranus is lingering at the end of the sign Pisces.
Pisces is the last sign of the zodiac, the Omega Point of the mandela. In the last degrees of Pisces we can get the feeling of things falling apart, the center can no longer hold. Something must die, must shift, must be cast out before we can start over again. With Uranus there, we can feel a tremendous urge to change. But Uranus energy is not consistent; what it wants one moment may not be what it wants the next. If we're not aware of it's push-pull tendencies and can't get perspective on the dynamic and the larger purpose of Uranus energy, it can feel like a visit to the grocery store with toddler hopped up on a bowl full of Fruit Loops. I want that! No, that! No, no, no! No say that!!!
Exhausting.
But if you can't take yourself home and solve the problem with a teddy bear and a nap, what do you do?
Reading a couple of weeks ago about Father Mychal Judge, I found the quotation above. I kept it; I don't know why. Perhaps for today. Who knows? Father Mychal was the first victim retrieved from the south tower collapse on 9/11, and according to the many stories I've read about him, he was an extraordinary ordinary man by any measurement. But I'll let you judge for yourself.
The quotation, however you think of its subject, suits a Scorpio Moon day like today. Father Mychal taught those who knew him there's a confidence that comes from knowing you have nothing left to lose. We usually learn this lesson from action heroes who, in a desperate leap of self-preservation and/or sacrifice, leap off a tall building or bust through a window and save the damsel in distress. Most of us gave up emulating action heroes long ago, though. And our heroism has long been replaced by doubt and fear. But Father Mychal's legacy suggests an alternative. Lingering here at the end of everything, we can surely find some strength in our doubts and fears.
Scorpio Moon doesn't scale mountains. Scorpio isn't an 'up and over' impulse, it's a 'down and under' strength. Scorpio Moon dives into the hidden stream that lies beneath the mountain of our frustration, and swims the depths of our unconscious fears to emerge on the other side of what we don't know. Scorpio gives us the will to explore what lies beneath the surface of everything.
Scorpio Moon will meet the Pisces Mercury, Sun, Venus and Uranus today and tomorrow --and share thoughts with Pluto in Capricorn, too. It's a co-mingling of emotional waters, running beneath the mountain that is this great shift in eras (Pluto in Capricorn). Some things are absolutely falling apart. What do you need to know about that? What don't you know yet? Where have you come to end of your confidence, creativity, assurance, skill, faith? What is your wall today?
Down and under...
Painting: G. OkoemovaSculpture: "Hombre en llamas" Jason DeCaires Taylor, underwater sculpture
